The Offspring - Splinter
This review might be a little biased, so either forgive me or deal with it. The Offspring is the band that got me into the music I like and was the first band that I liked on my own accord. Smash was the first album I bought for myself and if it weren't for the Offspring I might have gotten into something different. I owe a lot to them, seriously. They SHOULD be my favorite band for all intents and purposes. I never gave them that title and I still, to this day, wonder why I never did. I really am some sort of fool. Aside from me like worshipping them, I have also seen them twice and several of their posters adorn my wall. So you can see how excited I was when they finally released another one. I think it's been like three years since Conspiracy of One came out, but don't quote me. The album starts off as almost every Offspring album has, with an intro song. Unlike times previous, this one is actually a song song, more or less. It's like an intro song so it barely counts, but you know what I am saying. Not bad, but again it's an intro song, so we need to move on. The album as a whole is not bad, but I do have a few problems with it. It's not nearly as heavy as some of their earlier outings. I should probably say this: It's not Smash. So if that's what you are looking for then go home. In fact, it's not even Americana, or Conspiracy of One. So if you are looking for anything like that, go away. Being a die hard Offspring I am loath to call any Offspring album bad, but I can't say that this is their shining jewel either. You will definitely have to give this one a few listens, but there are some very good tracks. And, it does cover a lot of different styles. There are light songs and a few dark ones, and they seem to be experimenting more, like they have in their last two attempts. Although I must say I am again impressed by the social commentary that The Offspring have provided. Their first single Hit That has done fairly well, but I think it might be seeing a little club action as well. I don't know if it's true or not, but I am just going to say it is. And all the little teenys that are dancing to this song not paying attention to it. I laugh at them. It seems to me as if its a teen pregnancy song. Which makes me laugh even more at the irony of it all. It's things like that that make me love The Offspring. I can't in good conscience give this a bad review. I honestly do think it's a good album and one that could be bought with little or now regrets, but for the general audience I do add this disclaimer. If you are looking for Smash then fucking buy it, don't get Splinter because I don't want to hear you botch about how bad it sucks. You suck, for not being a real fan and sticking with them, and riding an OLD bandwagon that broke down years ago. To everyone else, I think you may enjoy it, maybe not as much as the new Good Charlotte album, but hey... Try it out, it can't hurt you too much. Track(s) of Love: This was pretty easy actually. When I first began to listen to the album, a few tracks caught my attention right away. Track 8: Never Gonna Find Me and Track 9: Lightning Rod caught me. Track 8 is good, but the transition into Track 9 is what makes it good. Lightning Rod has one of the coolest beginnings I have heard, and it sounds really good in headphones. It's like something is spinning around your head. It is also one of the heaviest songs on the album which, is one of the reasons I really like it. It also has some more classic Offspring sounding guitars to it. Another song I really really like is Track 2: The Noose. It didn't catch on right away, but after awhile I would repeat the track several times before moving on. It is also one of the heavier songs on the album and has a really catchy refrain and the 'woahs' you have come to know and love from the Offspring. If I had to pick just one track though, I would probably pick Track 9: Lightning Rod, just because it's a bit darker and i like that sort of thing. Track(s) of Doom: This is pretty much because we have to. I pick Track 1:Neocon. While I actually DO like this song, It's on here just because it's and intro and it's hard to get into. Track 12:When You're In Prison, just because as funny as it is(and it is very funny) It is also not really a song. I also pick Track 7:The Worst Hangover Ever. It's a goofy song. I am used to The offspring writing them so that's not a surprise. It just not something I get into. It's very upbeat and has horns and junk. People who come to this site might like it though. But since it's MY review and I hate, it makes it in the Tracks of Doom section. Since I don't really have too much of a beef with anyone of these tracks, I will let you pick the most evilest track of the three. And now it's time for the final marks. There is not really much more I can say about this. So I will just rate it and explain. On a Scale of -5 to 5 I give it a 1. Obviously it's better than most of the crap on the radio, even the good stuff. Yes I am aware that they play the Offspring on the radio, but it's still better so piss off. It is no where near the caliber of other Offspring albums so it still bears the shame of wearing a 1. If you think I am biased, then you are right, but if you don't like it ... well... I have already sent my trained assassins out to kill you.
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